Communication Breakdown, Birds, and a Brand New Year

Apparently, I don't speak fluent female
About a month ago, I was going to buy new running shoes, and since Katie needed to go to the Home Depot to get some paint, we, being environmentally-aware citizens of the world, decided we should go together rather than make two trips. As we climbed into the car, Katie asked me if there was a dry cleaner on the way, and I said I wasn't sure but thought there might be one. So off we went, and I said that I believed there might be a cleaner next to the supermarket, and she didn't really say anything, so I drove right on by the supermarket without turning in for a look-see, and then I spotted a cleaner up the road a bit and I pointed it out, and she didn't really say anything, so I kept on driving, which was apparently a really stupid thing to do, because I should have known that she wanted me to go to the cleaner. I pointed out that she hadn't said she actually wanted me to take her to the cleaner, just that she wanted me to find one, which I had done. She said that was ridiculous because if I was a woman, I would have known what she meant rather than listening to what she actually said (like a man), to which I replied, "But honey, I am a man," to which she made a snarky comment that I replied to in what I thought was a mildly amusing manner but she found irritating (in my defense, Carrie, who was riding along with us, found the whole argument to be pretty entertaining). Anyway, we went to the running shop and got my shoes, and as I was paying, Katie asked them if there was a cleaner in the shopping center, which there was, and we took the dress in there. I only recalled this little incident, because yesterday, Katie asked Carrie to go and get her some socks, which Carrie did, then Katie got on her case because she didn't bring her the "fluffy socks" that she really wanted, and Carrie said (quite reasonably, in my opinion), "But you didn't ask for the fluffy socks," and Katie said, "But you knew I wanted the fluffy socks," and they went back and forth like this for awhile, and I was sitting there listening and feeling a little bit vindicated. Which is probably petty, but oh well.

Weird bird incidents
Incident #1: When I was just a lad, I loved to play golf as much as possible, and one day as I was playing, I hit a beautiful nine-iron into the second green at the Airport Golf Course in Cheyenne, Wyoming. I stood there admiring my shot, watching the ball soar through the air, when suddenly, the ball smacked into a bird that was flying along and bird and ball fell to the ground, both of them well short of the green and deader than doornails (not surprising for the golf ball, of course, since it had never been alive). I'm not sure if this is an official rule, but my friend and I decided that as far as we were concerned, anytime you hit a bird in flight with your golf ball, your score on the hole is - can you see it coming? - a birdie.

Incident #2: Some of you may remember the epic battle from several years back when I tried to overseed my lawn with rye grass. I spent the entire day prepping the lawn, spreading seed and fertilizer, and hauling and raking mulch, then came out the next morning and found approximately nine thousand birds eating all the seeds. And in the middle of this ocean of birds sat Barney the dog, not doing a darn thing to stop them.

Incident #3: Most people think of the bald eagle as a majestic, noble creature, seeing as how it's all noble and majestic looking, with its steely gaze and fierce visage and all that jazz. Plus, it's the symbol of our great nation and symbolizes how noble and majestic and fierce-visaged and steely-gazed all of us Americans are. Well, all of that changed for me one day a couple of years ago when Katie and I were in Valdez, Alaska and saw a bunch of bald eagles being chased by seagulls. Apparently, the bald eagles are scavengers, and the gulls chase them away from their food, and even though the bald eagles are much larger (not to mention more noble and majestic-looking) than the gulls, the gulls must be tougher because the eagles seem pretty scared of them. So there was one particular bald eagle being chased by several seagulls, and this particular bald eagle was flying as fast as it could, swooping and swirling and taking other evasive actions until finally, in a desperate attempt to get away from the seagulls, it flew straight into a tree - thunk - and fell to the ground, where it sat shaking its head and then stumbled around like an eagle that's just flown into a tree.

Incident #4: Yesterday, Katie and I were driving home from a movie ("The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," which actually was a pretty darned curious case). I was going about 45 miles an hour on Oracle Road (what is it about Oracle Road? Among other things, I've seen four nuns in a Ford Taurus, a ninja jogger, and a monkey in a cage all on this one road) when all the sudden, out of nowhere, a large something flashed across my vision and - wham - smacked into the top of the windshield right in front of Katie, scaring the heck out of both of us and cracking the windshield. I'm pretty sure it was a hawk, and if it would've been a few inches lower, I think it might have come right through the windshield and wound up on Katie's lap. And no, I don't know what happened to the hawk, but I doubt if it could've been good.

Sunrise, Sunset
The Lute Olsen era has ended at the University of Arizona. The Mike Shanahan era has ended in Denver. I saw Larry Bird on a commercial the other day, and he looked older than Greg Oden (who's actually pretty young). Caitlyn went to orientation for her first job this morning. Carrie is going to turn 15 in a few days - which means she'll be driving before we know it (and we'll be adding another driver on our insurance - ouch). It's 2009(!). Wow.

With that, I'll sign off until next time, hoping that your communication with loved ones remains fluent and clear, your birdies stay on the golf course and out of your vehicles, and 2009 turns out to be the best year yet.